Jack Daniels? Move over, grandpa. For there is now nowt more rocktacular than a bottle of vodka shaped in THE HEAD OF A SKULL.
This is no novelty potato skin juice container, neither, nope. This is Crystal Head vodka and it’s made and promoted by Canadian Ghostbuster and Blues Brother, Dan Aykroyd.
Sure, the four-times-distilled-and-filtered-through-diamond-pantyhose (or somesuch) vodka has been out for a little while, actually is GOOD and got banned in the Canadian province of Ontario because it was “too cool”. (Actually, puritans at the liquor bored felt it would become too popular with teens because of its awesome bottle. The same teens who are in no way stealing their folks’ liquor and puking up in the bushes anyway.)
So why does it merit a BackstageRider post?
LOOK AT IT. STARE INTO ITS EYE SOCKETS. IMAGINE THE THINGS IT HAS SEEN! AMONG THEM, A REALLY BAD INDIANA JONES FILM!
Oh, and also, Elwood himself was in town to promote it.
So I spent my lunch hour buying the biggest bottle I could find and had Dan Aykroyd sign it. After three hours of the grip and grin, he was on auto-pilot in the shaky-hand department. But I asked him to do the devil’s
horns instead. He looked confused for a second. BUT. THEN. HE. DID. It was great, everyone laughed, he laughed, all was right in the world…and then I realized that the muppet I gave my camera phone was clearly as rubbish as my Crackberry. Which is why you will only see a stamp-sized blurathon on the homepage (but check it, to prove that I’m not lying).
It is, as they say, When Blues Brother Met Rock Hands.
He saw the large bottle (1.75l) and said “wow, you’ve got the big one. Share it with friends maybe?” And I said, “Naw, you either go big or go home right?”
I’ve already brought two to the UK to give to cool people. One is now in the gothicky hands of The McCarricks. It caused quite a stir. As I’m fully expecting it will be when I empty it. Rock and roll on, Bones, rock on. \m/
*Yep, I’m quoting Sebadoh again. I really wanted to quote (Canadian 80s mullet) Gowan’s “Strange Animal” by typing something like “Ominus Spiritus” but, like, one of you would have gotten that.
One response to “Crystal Head Vodka – Gently Take My Skull For a Ride*”
i fucking want this where can i get it